After I picked you up from school the other day, we walked over to get your brother and you put your arms up toward me like a toddler and said, "Pick me up Mummy."
"Oh honey. You're way too big for that. Do you want Mummy's arms to fall off?"
"Up Mummy." Your face was set on stubborn and I gave in. Of course I did. I haul up onto my hip all 40 plus pounds of you with a smattering of at least 20 kisses on your still cherbic cheeks because you still let me. You smile and wrap your arms around me and I don't care if people think you're too big for this. I indulge you and when it comes to affection there is never too much I can give to you and your brother.
This banter happens several times a week. I'll carry you for a bit and then it feels like my arms actually will fall off and down you go to run ahead home with your brother. Or you'll hold my hand ask me questions like, "Did I have gym today or not Mummy? Guess." "Did I play with so and so today Mummy? Guess." "Did I play tag today Mummy? Guess" And I do. When I get it right you ask, always, "How did you know? Why do you know everything Mummy?"
I revel in the fact that you think Mummy knows all but I'm sure to let you know, that sometimes, Mummy doesn't actually know everything.
I don't think you really believe me. I don't look forward to the day you do.
This year has been a bit of a revelation for me observing who you're turning into. I am so fortunate that I get to spend time with you at school and see you interact with your friends and teachers. You've turned into quite the confident little boy. You've never been afraid to speak your mind or simply be who you are. Funny, quiet, introspective, genuine. You have a certain quality about you that one can't quite identify but can only say, "That Fin. He is something." You are quirk personified. You are lovable. Everyone enjoys being around you.
And you love to hide on me. Ever since you were a baby...hiding is your favourite thing. I can't tell you how many near heart attacks I've had and no matter how many times I've explained why you need to stay close to me when we're in public you just think it's funny to hear me yelling out your name, searching for you like a crazy lady.
You love your Cheerios. You've pretty much eaten them everyday since you were a baby. You like to pour the milk. God help the person who pours your milk, for though you are quiet, your temper is volcanic. Mostly towards your big brother. No one can piss you off more than him. I suppose that's to be expected though.
You are incredibly thoughtful. Anytime we are out somewhere just the two of us and I get you something special you always ensure your brother gets something too. Remember when we were at the pharmacy and that nice lady gave you a lollipop? You made sure to ask for one for Adrian. It was a very proud Mom moment for me. I could see the woman's heart melt right in front of me. As did mine.
You have that ability with your angelic face and big blue eyes. To charm people. Lips like a perfect little rosebud and a voice that no one can get enough of. You still have a little lisp that is unbearably adorable. Perhaps I should get you into speech therapy though. It won't be as cute when you're 8.
You love little critters. It can be painful to get to school with you on the warmer days of spring and summer for every little potato bug, caterpillar and snail must be picked up, talked to, examined or moved to the grass so they don't get stepped on. It's endearing and I hope that your love for the tiny creatures on Earth continues. Who knows...maybe you'll become an entomologist one day.
Well my darling...I could go on and on and on about you but reality calls and I must get ready now. I have to be at your class in less than an hour. How lucky I am that I'm still able to see you throughout the day...though you don't run up to me anymore when I arrive, I'll take it as a good sign. You know I'm there. As I always will be.
Like the moments when I carry you around and nuzzle you, your head on my shoulder and your legs over my arms and exclaim, "You're my baaaaby!"
"I'm not a baby!"
"No. You're not a baby. But you are my baby. And you always will be."
No truer words have been spoken between Mother and Son, I think all Mother's can agree to that.
I love you big much baby boy. Forever and eternity plus one million thousand hundred.
Happy Birthday bug.
Love,
Mummy
My sweet, sweet Finley is now officially five.
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