Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Today I Got Smacked by Karma

As I've mentioned before Mother Nature's pissy attitude has almost gotten the best of me.  But I won't let her.

My husband is in Germany, living the high life working his tushy off as I wrestle, wrangle and referee two wild children that have yet to have more than 5 minutes of fresh air in the past 5 days.  I'm all for playing in the rain, don't get me wrong, but not when it's an unseasonal 8 degrees out.

Instead, I will spend over 40 dollars in 3 days at indoor playgrounds.

Is it worth it?

My sanity is.

Now, I've been to a few indoor playgrounds in my short time as a Mother but the one I went to today was AWESOME.  It had bouncy castles, bouncy slides, some seriously large climbing and play structures with about 5 different slides.  Free arcade racing games (not gonna lie...might have dabbled in them), a huge toy house with play pots and food, motorized motorcycles...and bonus....many comfy leather couches to sit my butt on.

Not that I had a chance to do much of that but it made me happy to know the option was there.

When we arrived only a couple of other families were there.  My boys immediately set off on their way and I watched with happiness in my heart and a smile on my face.

After about 45 minutes it became a lot busier and I took a moment to people watch.

Cause it's fun.

And it makes me feel better when I see other people's kids acting like mine do on a bad day.

One little boy was clinging to his Mom's leg as she tried to pry him off while not so convincingly convince him to ride on the nearby scooter.  Another toddler was literally flat out on the floor screaming to the Gods as her extremely pregnant and very tired looking Mother watched with aloof amusement (confession - I did too.  It was funny)  Another couple was coming up on the brink of exasperation as their 2 year old ran in and out of rooms that were supposed to be off limits and then there were 2 twin boys who were definitely under 2 basically wandering around on their own, their Mother with a newborn simply too exhausted to chase them up and down (claustrophobia inducing) play structures or go down the (very terrifying) slides with them.  Could I blame her???  Hell no!  I wanted to hug the poor woman.

See?  I can't breath even looking at this picture.

Me...barely breathing.

The "drop slides"... after panicking, crawling and climbing maniacally
through the never ending play structure I was almost tempted to go down this
slide with my 18 month old as my only way out.
The lack of oxygen clearly affected my brain.
I chose to embrace my fear of enclosed spaces over fear of heights and
turned the H.E. double hockey sticks around.

I sat and watched and thanked the lucky stars that my kids were being so great.

And then....

.....then after about an hour and 45 minutes the cold hand of karma slapped the smugness right outta me.

We took a break, sat down in the eating area and I doled out some snacks of fruit and raisin bread with their sippy cups of water.

Three things happened in the next 7 minutes that almost put my 3 year old over the edge.

1) The table next to us had brought Tim Horton's timbits with them (and damn them - they didn't offer him ANY!)

2) He noticed that there were juice boxes displayed on the counter and he HAD to have one.

3) His brother kept stealing his grapes.

That's when I decided that it was time to go.  It was almost lunch time and clearly both my boys were getting tired.

Well, if he was near the edge before he dove right off just then.

I'm talking even worse than the worst tantrum he's had to date.

As the employees of the place watched in undisguised bemusement, Adrian screamed, cried, kicked and refused to put on his rain boots and jacket.  I gave up, got Finley and I dressed to leave all the while my son made an absolute spectacle of himself.  I did the "Okay, Fin and I are leaving now...good-bye.".

That was a big mistake.  If I thought the decibals of his screams couldn't get any louder.

They did then.

After almost 10 minutes of the ridiculous shenanigans he eventually got dressed in his jacket and boots.

As we walked out the door... all began again.

He pounded, yelled and cried that he "want to play MORE!!" at the door of the indoor playground.

As I was holding Finley (who weighs a mere 28 lbs) and it was raining out, I was really beginning to lose my patience.  Of-course my truck was parked ACROSS the large lot so I couldn't just leave Adrian, buckle Finley in and come back lest my 3 year old darts in front of a car in a massive case of hysteria and gets squished like a bug.

Although I nearing hysterics as well and wanted to squish him like a bug myself at that very moment.

After 10 more minutes of losing his mind he followed me to the truck and I buckled Finley in.

Buckling him in was a whole other ordeal of him screaming, kicking and squirming.  But it got done.

Even still...I had to listen to this:

I know you can't hear him...but I'm sure you can imagine what it sounded like.
While, thank goodness, my other son looked like this:

Ahhh, my sweet, sweet Fin...I know someday you'll give me
strife but as of that moment, you were my favourite.

How many more days until my husband is home?

Oh that's right, he just left YESTERDAY.

Pass the wine please.


Csilla said...

:(Poor Finney-boo..he looks...confused?! God help us somedays...they are calling for sunny day tomorrow...sunny day...

January Dawn said...

He was trying to watch Brother Bear over the hysterical crying of more like concentrating. I sure hope it's sunny tomorrow. 5 days of non-stop rain has done me in.

Lisa said...

OMG, I don't mean to laugh but OMG I know that face.

The weather here has sucked too...must find indoor playground..

I feel for you darlin. I do love when the one who's calm looks at the crazed one with that "What the heck is your problem?" Look.

Ellen said...

Hysterical! I'm sure it wasn't for you at the time but very well written GG. I could feel your pain.