Friday, April 8, 2011

Broody, Moody Me

It's been a nerve fraying, head aching, "I'm going to effing lose my mind" kind of week.

My little guy is not only just sick but teething (of which he handles terribly) and is clinging to me like a fifth limb, damp eyes, drooly mouth, runny nose.  Oozing from every orifice on his adorable yet gooey face. Trails of mucous swiped across every piece of clothing I wear.  I cannot even put him down for a moment before he's hysterical.  Oh the squeals!  I can't blame him - poor little guy - and I know I should have more sympathy but it's hard when I'm feeling more sorry for myself.

Jesus.  What kind of Mother am I?

My three year old SOMEHOW is becoming more challenging by the day with his whys (honestly, how many whys can a Mom answer before she wants to scream "BECAUSE!  JUST BECAUSE OKAY!???") I haven't...but it's there...right on the tip of my dangerously sharp tongue.  His persnickety ways about how he wants his food cut, which is different everyday (and God forbid two different foods touch), and his whining!  Oh, the whining!!!  It's like nails on a chalkboard.  I simply cannot handle it.

I feel like a horrible parent because all I've been doing is nagging, yelling or getting frustrated with everyone including my innocent sweet old dog.

My children are like 2 mini hurricanes destroying my house moment to moment, I have piles of laundry and bathrooms to clean (and only have an hour to do all while the boys nap) but I simply have no energy to do ANY of it.  Instead I'll just sit here and pound away on my laptop venting at my silly blog.

The only thing giving me a tiny bit of bliss is stuffing my face with far too many homemade peanut butter cookies.  Of which I'll feel sick to stomach and repulsed by myself after I consume them because I haven't been to the gym in 4 months and already feel like a massive protuberance of goo without ingesting five million calories.

And since when did I become an emotional eater?

This is not good.

Not good at all.



paradigmjohn said...


Attila said...

It's all good Jan! Csilla has gone through the same thing, so you're definitely not alone! Vacuuming, Laundry is usually behind (and that's with Csilla doing a great job, when she has a free minute!) Branden screams every 5 minutes, even when he is healthy!! Haha
Somedays, I just want to take them and slam them on their beds and close the door, but, don't worry, as you know, it always gets better!

Michelle said...

I could've written this exact post this week except substitute potato chips for the cookies, hang in there! Hopefully next week is muuuuuuuch better. For their sake. ;-)

January Dawn said...

Oh Attila. I guess I should be happy that my little guy isn't a screamer on most days. ;)

Thanks Michelle...I knew at LEAST one other mother out there could relate this week. It probably would've been potato chips along with the cookies but, fortunately (for the sake of my ass) I didn't have any.

Ellen said...

Well GG. I don't know what to say because I remember those days even though they were 30 years ago. Part of it is cabin fever/spring fever. There is no simple solution. Just know it doesn't last forever.

Sarah Grace said...

first of all, forget about your tiny hot will not be destroyed by a couple nights of stuffing your face...DO IT, for the sake of your sanity...and secondly, top off the cookies with wine once you've tossed the kids into bed! ;) and yes, we've all been there...or are there, currently, so breath, i've never seen anything but patience ooze from you, so i'm guessing you're doing great!

January Dawn said...

Thanks Sarah. You are very kind in your words. The next time I feel like having a frazzled freak out I will imagine patience oozing through my body. Love it.