Thursday, December 6, 2012

First Crush

There is a girl in Adrian's life.  Girlfriend that is.  Actually, three if you were to ask him.  However one he sees only once or twice a year, the other is in his class and has no idea that she's his girlfriend so we need to keep it on the DL according to him and the third girl...last but definitely not least...well...she lives across the street from us.  And happens to be an older girl.  Like grade ONE older.  She's also his best friend's sister.

Things could start to get awkward soon.

At first I resisted this whole girlfriend/crush thing.  Four years old is far too young to be talking about girlfriends.  Am I right?  But then I took a minute and recalled my first crush.  Shall I just rewind about 30 years?  The scene takes place in my kindergarten class...


"He's really cute." she said to me.

I was bewildered.  Cute?  A boy?  But no.  That can't be. Cats are cute.

But a boy?  Cute?

I looked over to where she was pointing.  We stood by the cloakroom huddled in whispers.  He was standing at the paint station goofing around with a couple of other boys.

"He is cute."  The sandy reddish pin straight bowl cut, the sprinkle of light freckles across the bridge of his nose, his dimples.

It was like my eyes opened up to a whole new world at that moment.


So then I realized I shouldn't downplay my son's feelings.  They are real.  They exist.  I need to validate them without making a big fuss about it.

A fine balance.

Since then there have been pictures exchanged between the two of them. It seems the crush is not just one sided.  Her name's been written over and over on pieces of paper.  Accentuated by glittery heart stickers.  She drew him a picture the other day...with the words "I like you" written across the sky.

It really does make a Mother's heart feel conflicted.  For the past almost 5 years I've been the female who was the centre of his universe.  I knew the time would come eventually when I wouldn't be the only woman in his world.  The time has evidently come too soon. For me. At the same time I get to see the tender side of my rambunctious little guy.

And so here I begin the treacherously delicate road, guiding the way for my son, teaching him how a girl should be treated..

As well as, on an ongoing basis, his father does by the ever important example of how he treats me.

Adrian drawing her a pony.  And a Vampire Tooth Egg.

Ava's picture for Adrian.  So sweet.

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