Sunday, February 6, 2011

Motherhood. A Serious Matter?

Today my baby, Finley, is 15 months.  I know.  Not too interesting of a fact but I thought today would be a good day to check up and see how his "milestones and developments" are coming along.

 It's so funny how different you are with your second child.  With Adrian, I was constantly looking up what milestone he "should" be at.

Like weekly.

I know.  Obsessive much?  But I know I'm not alone in this instance.  First time Mother's are pretty obsessive when it comes to their babies.  And all the parenting books and online sites don't help this matter.  There are millions upon trillions of books and sites on how to make sure your child is the next Einstein, Picasso and or Bach.  Parents (well mostly Mom's) are barraged by these topics of conversations from magazines, to the Mom Show.

Ask your Mother who and what she referred to when we were wee ones.

Actually you don't have to.  I will tell you.  It was the family doctor or Dr Sears.

Do you think our Mom's drew squiggly lines with black magic marker on a white sheet of paper and waved it in front of our poor 3 week old still blurry eyes because they read somewhere it helped stimulate our brain activity?  (I actually did this.  I know. I'm so embarrassed)  Did they follow every word the Baby Whisperer wrote about napping, eating and playing schedules because by God, if they didn't their child would surely become a socially inept insomniac with serious food issues?  No way!  Did they fret and have major guilt issues over not being able to or not choosing to breastfeed?  No, and generally speaking Mom's of that generation did not breast feed.  I'm pretty sure our generation turned out okay.  Right?....Right?  I think so.

There are many great sites out there for "referring" to and that's what they should be used as.  I remember  reading online about a mother concerned that her 2 week old wasn't sleeping through the night.  Even I, in all my crazy, new, hormonal Motherhood knew that was taking it too far.

So I say, take what you believe works for you and your babe and forget the rest.  Or don't read a thing and go by your gut instinct.  I read far, far, far too many books and took parenting so seriously with Adrian.  I'd like to think I enjoyed his babyhood more but I fear I put far too much pressure on myself.  I've learned my lesson and I am completely 100% enjoying Finley in all his scrumptious baby and toddlerhood.

Okay.  That was a bit of a ramble.  Excuse me.

Back to sweet Finley and his 15 month old milestone development:

According to an article I recently came across, at 15 months your baby should at least be doing the following:

Play with ball:  What exactly does that mean?  Specifics would help here.  If that means he can dribble it up a basketball court and score 3 pointers, well, he might need to work on that particular skill.  Finley likes to simply pick up the ball and let it drop...bounce...bounce....bounce...rolllll....away it goes and off he toddles after it to do it all over again.  Or gnaw on it.  I say he passes the test don't you?

Second on the list:  Learns 5 words other than initial vocabulary....uh oh.  My son can sure babble up a storm and he is completely convinced that it makes all the sense in the world.  I think it's pretty much the most adorable sound ever.  But seriously?  He doesn't even have 5 words in his "initial vocabulary" let alone 5 additional ones.  I'm pretty sure when he points at something and says "utsat" he's saying "What's that?" and I think that when he waves his hands around frantically (and starts throwing the food on the floor) after a meal and says "alda" he's telling me he's "All done".  Oh and my husband is pretty proud of the fact that he taught him the word "dirty" which Fin surprisingly says with great articulation.


He, does, however love singing the Buzz Lightyear theme da, do da, do didda do.  In fact I'll go as far to say as he's mastered it.  Now that is way cooler than being able to say "cat" or "dog"...don't you think?

The third and final "milestone" on the list of things that your baby should at least doing at 15 months is.....walk backward.

Walk backward???  Really?  Didn't they just learn how to walk forward?

Okay, okay, this one he can do.  He actually makes a game out of walking backward into our sweet dog Riley, who puts up with far more shananigans from my sons than any animal should ever have to deal with.  For some reason when Finley walks backward into her it unsettles her terribly and she simply doesn't know what to do with herself.  And he thinks its hilarious.  Poor Riley.  *sigh*

My point to this blog entry is for any new Mom that might happen to be reading this right now, please, do yourselves a favour.  Relax.  Stop reading so much.  Don't compare your babe to any others (it's natural human behaviour to do such a thing but try not to).  Revel in your baby's smell, coos, smiles, giggles and squish their delicious, dimply baby bums because that is what being a Mother is about in the early stages.

Delight in all your baby's individuality and uniqueness.

But most of all...don't take yourself too seriously.


Ellen said...

Hey Darling....I knew you would come to your senses with Finley. Excellent advice by the way. I remember you being afraid to use Gripe water until you checked with your doctor.

Tanya said...

Excellent post! I'm taking notes...Thanks Sweetness! XOX

Kristin said...

And really...these little creatures are truly way smarter that we are.....let them lead the way!