Friday, January 4, 2013

A Mix of Morning Breath and Chocolate slashed with Guilt

They teem with energy and I wish for quiet.  To be left.

Alone.

I wish for the bickering, for God's sakes! to end!

An empty tummy sloshing with coffee leaves me agitated.

They ask for some Christmas chocolate and though it's before 9 am I sigh and hand it over with guilt and wonder,

Am I the only Mother that gives in so easily in tired defeat?  To stop the whining?

Once it's gone.  It's gone.

Once it is gone.  It is gone.  

This reverberates in my mind and I gnaw at the meaning.

It drifts and I'm left with a sense of doubt.

Always the doubt.

They've had their breakfast after all.

They used their manners so I must be doing something right.  Right?

Right?

And they always share treats with their Mumma.

Sometimes I don't even have to ask.

Besides.  I could use a bit of sweetness right now.

My littlest approaches me with his 3 year old cherubic face inches from mine and his funny questions,

"Mummy 'mell my bweff?"

And I do.  Of-course I do.  Because Mothers?  We do all kinds of weird and gross things for our children.

I sniff into his mouth.

A mix of morning bweff and chocolate.

Delicious.

I pull him close.

5 comments:

Kristin said...

And here I was thinking that I was the only one that loved to smell my babe's morning bweff. I was just commenting the other day that at age 3 it still has the baby "fresh" smell to it, whereas my 5 year old has moved on to a more offensive smell. Regardless, I always love the smell of them in the morning and late at night when I tuck them in one last time! To most this would sound silly, I am sure.

January Dawn said...

Yes, the five year olds bweff is not nearly as sweet but I still weirdly love the smell. I even like the stink of their feet. Are we weird Kristin!?? ;) I don't think it sounds silly one bit - I believe most parents think similarly. And if not - I'm ok with being a bit odd.

My Inner Chick said...

Gorgeous. Beautiful.

Love your writing, Mummy. X

January Dawn said...

Thanks so much Inner Chick!

Kristin said...

YAY for odd, bweff smelling mamas! Just tonight my youngest asked me to smell her bweff as she was eating a carrot! happily I obliged and thought of this post! ; )